FOUR MONTHS
This month has felt quite long. I've been acutely aware of every passing second. Watching this day approach with dread, now that it's here, I am oddly void. Again, I just want to mark this day. Acknowledge my passage to this point
Though my abuser devised a plan and recently forced a face-to-face with me, I have not initiated contact with him in four months. One of the hardest things I've done. I never thought I'd be here. I never thought he wouldn't be. But I can feel the pain at its edges beginning to form tender scabs.
Last month it was too much to even think about trying, but I've recently been feeling I may be able to do it. Something formal to recognize my escaping the abuse. At times I've felt I've really wanted this, other times it's seemed to be completely unnecessary.
Whatever the case, it is some small accomplishment, pulling myself away from the narcissistic abuser. Somehow, I'm doing it. I just want to mark the day.
Though my abuser devised a plan and recently forced a face-to-face with me, I have not initiated contact with him in four months. One of the hardest things I've done. I never thought I'd be here. I never thought he wouldn't be. But I can feel the pain at its edges beginning to form tender scabs.
Last month it was too much to even think about trying, but I've recently been feeling I may be able to do it. Something formal to recognize my escaping the abuse. At times I've felt I've really wanted this, other times it's seemed to be completely unnecessary.
Whatever the case, it is some small accomplishment, pulling myself away from the narcissistic abuser. Somehow, I'm doing it. I just want to mark the day.
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